Self-Love Sunday Vol. I

I ran 4 miles yesterday. The significance of this sentence may seem so little or pointless to start a blog with. Some may say I’m looking for praise, others may say it’s a simple brag, but this entire Self-Love Sunday came to me while running….

Last year, I went more than 6 months without going to the gym. 2017 on paper was one of the best years of my life, yet I did not treat my body with respect for such a long period. I can count on my two hands and maybe one toe how many time I worked out. Hell anytime I did go it was posted to social media for the praise I say I’m not seeking now. This way I’d feel a little less shitty about how little I was doing to appreciate my body.

I myself have faced small be real experiences with depression. I rarely, if ever, have spoken about this, and I’ve never put it on a social platform for others to read about. But I’m lying to you all with my pretty instagram photos and “love myself” post if we do not speak of how I got here. This is a battle I am still dealing with, I probably will always deal with, but self love is about facing your fears, taking a leap of faith, opening your heart for your own love!

I finally took my leap of faith after my last failed relationship and I went to therapy for the first time. My goal was to save my relationship and instead found out how much better I am without him. See, by the end of my 6 weeks of therapy I knew I wasn’t healed, but I did realize I needed to find myself, what I love, what I’m passionate about; not what I’ve become for someone else. Since a young age I yearned for male affection and all my relationships I became someone else, trying to mold into their world and what they want. This brought upon mental abuse, self loathing, body shaming and so many other self destructive things. Once I let go of the idea of pleasing someone else I was able to start healing.

If you are currently facing depression, self loathing or any time so self distraction or hatred here are a few of the steps I recommend:

1. Talk with a therapist, but the right therapist. It took me about 6 different sessions with 6 different people over two months to find my perfect connection. Do not settle; you will not find progress

2. Create a social platform that builds and lifts you up! If you are currently following pages that make you feel less of a person, unfollow them. If you are not inspired to be better and more grateful unfollow them. the apps themselves also play a part: if you see ads that offend you, make you feel worthless, like you need to lose we or transform your body or mind report them!

3. Give yourself the opportunity to leave toxic relationships, whether family, friends or significant others. Even work!! No one deserves to be treated less than amazing.

4. Create a gratitude list. Everyday write something you’re grateful for or love about yourself! The more you tell yourself you’re beautiful the more you believe it and soon the glimmer that was always there shines a little brighter.

5. Lastly, read books!! My current recommendations: The Goddess Revolutions, Healthy Is The New Skinny, #GirlBoss, Girl Code, Make Your Mark

I ran 4 miles yesterday. This is only my second time running in over a year, but I took a leap of faith and changing my circumstance. By doing this small but significant gesture for my mental health I have been going to the gym and it has become easier, more fun, a commitment to myself! Working on myself in the gym has lent me the ability to run the longest I have ever done. Don’t give up on yourself! Our body’s are so powerful and our strongest most influential muscle we have is our mind. There is always light, gratitude and the ability to grow; remember that 💞

Sincerely, neruaelle


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